Sunday, March 28, 2004

Springtime on The Jeremy Show

I went out to brunch today with a good friend of mine and her boyfriend. They chose to sit in non-smoking. Actually, they tried to pass off some lie about it being non smoking during breakfast...I wasn't buying it. But hey, I'm flexible whatever.

Whenever, I go to a restaurant and I can't smoke and I smile and act like it's no big deal-- I AM REALLY PANICKING INSIDE. I don't know what it is. I think I am worried about the conversation that I am (by normal social standards) expected to take part in. I find it much easier to talk with a cigarette in my hand.

Today, I went outside the restaurant, while we were waiting for our food and had a cigarette and realized that it is spring! The garbage smelled sweeter. The clothes were shorter. People seemed happier. I felt like I was on vacation.

I went back in the restaurant and said, "I feel like I'm in California." This announcement was met with a quizzical, "Really?"

Talking to people is hard.

Undated Journal Entry

I am a PseudoSlacker. That's someone who has tried and failed so many times, that it looks like I'm not trying at all. Really, I am just not too smart.

Rather than having some hippie revelation after college and deciding to pursue leisure as a way of life, I work a minumum wage job like a madman. I'm not tricking the system, folks. I don't even know what the system is.

Monday, March 15, 2004

Book club run by man with low self esteem and very bad memory

I had a dream that Oprah picked me to pick her next book for "Oprah's Book Club." I was so excited in the dream. It was almost a wet dream. I wasn't concerned about the book at all, more about Oprah picking me. In fact, I don't think I could come up with a book if she really did pick me. I've read some good books. But I don't think other people would like them. Here is my list of books that you probably won't like:

1. The Catcher in the Rye by J.D. Salinger
See I told you, we are already off to a bad start. But, it was the first book (that wasn't a female celebrity biography) that I actually read all the way through. I fell in love with the character and I actually got chills at the end. Guess that makes me a serial killer like all the other people who are obsessed with that book. Judging by my Jeffrey Dahmer wardrobe lately, things could easily slip down that path.

2. How We Die by Sherwin B. Nuland
I read this book last summer while I was working at a temp job opening doors for people with a buzzer. It was at the Macarthur Foundation, a philanthropic organization that donates money to rich people. I also had to answer phones. I kept accidentally answering the phones "The McCartney (as in Paul and Linda)Foundation" or the "Mccarthy (as in Joe) Foundation." The only thing that I remember from the book was that the way everybody dies is lack of oxygen reaching the brain. I was/am so (over?)medicated that I don't remember much else about it. It was really good though. It belonged to my roommate.

3. His Bright Light by Danielle Steel
See what I mean-- it's by Danielle Steel. I mean come on. It was good though. It's one of those books that I read passages from every now and then. It's about Danielle Steel's son who committed suicide. Very tragic. People express concern when I read books about depressed people. I get depressed when people express concern that I'm reading books about depressed people. So, you know.

4. Possessing the Secret of Joy by Alice Walker
I read this so long ago that I have no idea what the hell it's about. Something about female circumcision in Africa. I remember it being good though. I think I read it in the summertime. I'm sure I thought I was real smart for reading it. But I do remember liking it. If you do read it, let me know what it's about because I can't remember. I like Alice Walker. I also like the color of the book. It's purple. Go figure.

5.Imagine That by Lydia Stux (Epilogue), Russell Denver Harold
Ok, this one I really do remember. This is just a collection of letters back and forth between a gay man and his best female friend. Russell lives the 1980's San Francisco gay life and Lydia is back home in the Midwest. I am so obsessed with what it would be like to be gay and young in 1980's San Francisco. .Imagine That really gives you a good idea of what it would be like, Pre-AIDS and Post-AIDS. Really good.

Well, enjoy what you choose to read, cuz I know damn well no one is gonna read any of these books. Or even this blog, who the HELL AM I KIDDING. I might as well be typing on a computer that's not turned on!!!!!!

It's my party and I'll blog if I want to.

Originally Published
Sat Feb 28, 09:07:11 PM

In an effort to be able to try and sleep before 4:00 AM, I have decided to ban coffee after 1:30 PM. Oh, but I want it so bad now!!!

I am afraid that my blog will come off as showing that I have the personality and intelligence of a fourth grade girl, as one person once said I did. If it's true, so be it. This fourth grade girl wants to blog.