the story of easter

easter makes me think of sunday school in california. i remember half listening to some story about jesus dying and coming back to life. seemed a little suspicious. something about a rock being moved. the entrance to a cave where he was hiding? did he go into a cave? and then they found his dreamcoat?

jesus was crucified and on the third day (everything is in threes right? like die hard and back to the future movies) he rose again and he said that he had died for all of our sins. all very confusing. like murder she wrote.

i saw "who's afraid of virginia woolf" last night with Ms. Kathleen Turner. i went with two dear friends. the play was great. ms. turner, despite some coughing that wasn't in the script was genius! bill irwin was wonderful. although, i must say, like the story of easter and murder she wrote, i had trouble following. i had seen the movie and remembered that i liked it. but i know now that i liked it not because of the story but because of elizabeth taylor. in the climactic scene at the end where they are talking about their son, i wanted to get up, stop the play and say--

"ok. before we go on, was there a son? did you have a son or were you writing a book about a son? was the son gay? is that what all this fighting is about? because i remember that there was a movie that elizabeth taylor was in "suddenly last summer" where she's all upset because a gay guy killed himself. is that what this ones about? is martha barren? if we could have a quick discussion i think i would get a lot more out of this. and while we're at it- how old are you kathleen turner? and why the tj maxx pajama pants? elizabeth taylor did not wear those as i recall. and i loved you in war of the roses. and your voice reminds me of my friends mom. and i loved you in serial mom. and i did not see body heat but i know that was your breakout movie. thank you."

i did not say these things and i am still unclear as to what all the fighting was about. im sure my boyfriend can fill me in. oh how he must suffer with a mildly retarted boyfriend who cant digest a simple plot.

there were some mumblings in the bathroom during the play:

"she has arthritis, that's why she's so puffy. it's because of the medication she takes."

"she's just a puppy. she's fifty two. just a puppy." -- a puppy!!! gross

"i saw it in the seventies i think. must have been the seventies."

then after the play two old ladies, one with died eggplant hair with white roots and balding hair:

"aren't you glad we came. it's really exhausting. i knew you'd be glad we came"

stories are hard to follow and hard to tell. but that's not really the point, is it? the point is what you look like, if you're gay or not, where or if you can smoke, where the nearest 24 hour walgreens is, and if you think you can get by another day without taking a shower.