deleted scenes

here are some blog posts that i never finished or never posted:

hair
6/26/06

i just looked in the mirror. who is this person with the long hair? who are you-- long haired freako boy? cut your hair and shape up! i want a shaved clean cut haircut. none of this sissy shit. tip top shape. i want a haircut that makes sense. it confuses me.

its such a neurotic thing i've started with this hair.

I'd like to know where you got the notion...
4/26/06

Yesterday, I downloaded a bunch of disco songs. During my trip on the bus to school down Lakeshore drive I listened to "Rock The Boat" by the Hues Corporation. The waves were really outstanding and the disco horns and strings and my caffeine high had me in a Studio54-cocaine-promiscuous-sex trance.

I never did cocaine, thank god. It would be the end of me. I am so addicted to cigarettes, I can't imagine what I would be like with "blow". A long long time ago I went to a party and was offered me some. Luckily, a friend told me that with my history of

a day in the life
2/15/06

My current routine. I get up at about 6 AM-ish when I have school. Smoke a cigarette in bed, dangerously half asleep. Put some coffee on. Usually turn NPR on but don't listen at all. Take my pills: Lexapro, Trileptal, Prilosec. Brush my teeth, put on some deodorant, get dressed. Set my microwave timer for when I have to leave the house. Sit down at my computer, smoke and drink coffee and an Ensure, surf the web.

This is my favorite time of the day.

The microwave timer goes off. I push it another ten minutes or so. Finally get up and put on my jacket - making sure that I have my cellphone.

I go out to the bus stop which is, thankfully, very close to my apt. I study the other people waiting. Decide who is hot and who is not, all while listening to my iPod on shuffle.

Get on the bus, saying hello to the busdriver- probably very loudly becuase I have my iPod on. Sit in my usual seat. I like this bus route because I can see the lake in the morning. As people get on, I am continuing my scan for my boyfriend. Deciding which one I am in love with and try to decide if he is in love with me.

I am drinking coffee out of a stainless steel travel mug so I start to get all hyped up on caffeine and the initial yet very temporary speedy effects of my antidepressants. I decide to text message people stupid things. These text messages are usually regretted by the end of the day.

voltron
2/15/06


today in documentary class we watched the first 30 minutes of "fahrenheit 911", "fahrenHYPE 911" and "outfoxed," which i thought i would hate- just because im so done with those documentaries- but that blank screen with just the audio in "fahrenheit 911" when the twin towers are hit always gets me. so effective as you sit there and your imagination paints the picture- incredible.

i went outside for two smokes on my break and this guy literally jumps me for a cigarette. "give me one of those camels!" for a minute i think about saying no, but he is essentially mugging me for a cigarette, so i pull one out.

"I shouldn't have done that, jumping up on you like that."

I am silent.

"I'm from New Orleans. Chicago is crazy. There's actually burros and shit. I thought New Orleans was big," as he lights the cigarette he mugged me for with the lighter I give him.

"You a student."

"Yes."

"Music?"

"Television."

"Television? So you go to school and when your done here what do you think your gonna do? Direct?"

"Writing"

"Well they sure need more writers. They're running out of ideas in Hollywood. Now I see they are doing 'Curious George'. I saw that and I said shit... Next they're gonna do 'Puff the Magic Dragon' or some shit."

"You are right."

"When they do a movie of Voltron, you know it's all over."

On my way back upstairs to watch more movies that I've already seen I decide that he has put into words basically about the same amount of information that I am paying $900,000 to hear.

That's not exactly true. My self esteem and general sanity is worth all the money that I am putting into this college song and dance. Being forced to get up, to read and to write, to be exposed occasionally to new things

water
1/28/06


just got a 24 pack of dasani from peapod. water. uh! interesting. not so bad.

watermelon. watersports. watershow. waterskis. waterfall.

when i had my first meltdown that involved illegal substances and a major freak out and post it notes posted all over my parents kitchen when i was in a blackout. i checked myself into a hospital. parents were called and my dad picked me up and took me

Chapter One
1/02/06

We are riding along in a car in front of a green screen.

there's only ONE STAR on the jeremy show
12/20/05

In preperation for spending a week with my parents I am trying to tell my DVR not to record every I Love Lucy and Brady Bunch and it has frozen up. Apparently it does not understand how I don't want to do that.


The Six Steps
2/15/05

As I'm sure I've said before in at least one of our many conversations I worked at McDonald's for ten years. They always say pass on your wisdom, pay it forward- so here's some valuable information I learned. Print it out and use it as a "cheat sheet" for your first day at work. I hope this will bring you the happiness and good fortune that it has to me.

The Six Steps for taking an order at McDonald's

1. Greet the Customer

"Welcome to McDonald's can I take your order?"
"Hi, Can I help you?"
"What can I get you today?"
"Hey Wanda, glad to see you're back on your feet after the boating accident. You're usual today?"

Pretty easy. The key is to vary it. Don't say the same thing to each coustomer. They may begin to suspect that you are going through the emotions or even get the impression that you don't like your job that much. Oh! Don't forget to smile. And not a fake smile. I want a real toothy, tingly, just can't contain yourself smile. Good, this is the first step, the rest will be a cakewalk.

2. Take the order

Now this might sound easy. It's just punching in whatever the customer says, right? WRONG! Taking the order is all about active listening. You ever heard that, active listening? Active listening is really engaging yourself in the communication process with your customer. You should be giving eye contact while the customer speaks, letting the customer know that you care about what sandwich or value meal choices they are making.

**Really Important** Never, ever say "Will that be all?" or "Is that it?" when you feel like the customer is wrapping up. We don't want to close the door on the oppurtunity for the customer to make more selections. Instead, try "Do you feel like a Fruit N' Yogurt Parfait today?" or "Did you want to try our new Chicken Selects?"

Also, I've noticed that the one thing that new people like you forget is to ask "Is this for here or to go?" Don't forget to ask. Otherwise, at this point you're standing like a deer in headlights trying to remember what to do next. Don't be an idiot.

3. Assemble the order
Okay, so now we know if it's for here or to go so either grab the appropriate sized bag or put the sanitized tray with a trayliner on the counter.

The first thing you want to do is make the drinks. We can let the drink run while we're getting the rest of the items.

Next, we get the sandwich. If the sandwich isn't ready DON'T GET THE FRIES. Return to the counter and move to step 4.

4. Present the order
Presentation is the key to any good meal. Place all the items on the tray if the order is for here. The drink should not be touching the sandwich or the fries. Remember, hot stays hot, cool stays cool. If the order is to go, place the items in the bag correctly (don't mash it all together). The bag should be crisp and double folded and faced toward the customer with the golden arches faced out.

5. Receive Payment
Start with, "Okay, you're order today is [insert total] today." The customer will present you with a bill. Enter the money given on the cash register. Discreetly place half of the money given into your pocket and give the customer the change out of the drawer.

6. Than